As I finished the holiday season I think all the awesome things in my life. I started Christmas morning with my almost 4 yr. old daughter easing toward to the family room to see what Santa had left. She was so precious as she reached for the “Thomas” items, eased each inexpensive item out of her stocking, felt of her soft new robe and finally stepped onto the 2 speed battery powered 4 wheeler. What a sight to watch! My heart was filled with love and aderation! She had gone to throw some paper away when she noticed that Santa had eaten the cookies and drank the milk we had made last night. She said, MOM (in a soft, shocked voice) and pointed for me to notice. With a smile I said “I know, do you think he liked them.” Then she asked me how our pillows on our couch got messed up. (I did not want to explain that I had used that area while getting all the items out, and not straightened them up) I said I was not sure but maybe Santa had needed a nap while he was here. We went outside and road the 4 wheeler. Which she mastered in no time. Even “spinning out” within 10 minutes from turning it on. Later in the day, she told Nanny about how Santa had eaten the cookies and taken a nap at our house. I waited so long in life to have this awesome day and it brings tears to my eyes to think how fortunate I am. On top of all of this, I got all a person could want for Christmas and have had a great holiday.
Yet somehow today, I am very aware of how much sadness is in the world. I wish everyone could see every obsticle as an opportunity. That everyone could take all the pain in their heart and channel it toward something exciting and meaningful. That each one of us could see the positive before we see the negative. Why is it that we first pay attention to the sad, the painful, the agony, the negative, and the need to escape reality? Is it the media’s fault? I don’t think so. It is our fault. If we did not thrive on the negative, they would report the positive.
I guess what has gotten me thinking today are several memories and several friends lives right now. You see, I had what I think of, as one of the best Dad’s a person could have. He and I were very close and had a great deal in common. My dad lived life like there was no tomorrow. He worked hard, smiled everyday and had a really great ability to make everyone feel special. When I was 18 and he was 45, he had a severe heart attack which left him disabled and unable to live the life he loved so much. Two and a half months later he passed away. I spent a year of my life angry, sad and somewhat withdrawn. I have missed him terribly every since. Sure, some days I think of him and laugh and other days I can’t think of him without crying. Twenty two years have passed and I now know how grateful I am to have had the Dad I had. I just I did not have him long enough. I look around at Dad’s on drugs, Dad’s that drink to much, Dad’s that never take the time, and Dad’s that just don’t seem to notice and I realize how lucky I was. I know I was fortunate to be born into the family I was born into. Not only did I have a great Dad but I still have a wonderfully, strong and awesome Mom. She has taught me so much and I could never repay her for what she has meant to me.
I married my high school sweetheart when I was 24 only to go through a divorce when I was 30. My heart was broken and I spent 6 months working and going home. I did not want to face anyone and just knew everyone in our small town was talking about us. My brother told me that I had just joined the other 50% of the population and my mother kept telling me to get angry. But any of you that have been through a divorce that was not your idea, know how painful that is. The great thing is that once that 6 months past I realized that I had a whole life to live and I better start living it. One of the first things I did was dig a hole in the ground and build my first house. From that point on I have not stopped. I am still single and 4 years ago I adopted my daughter. Every day I thank God for giving me the courage to look at my glass half full!
One of my lifelong friends has recently confided in me that her husband is drinking 3 liters of alcohol a week and is being abusive. Another high school friend has called me within the last 30 days to tell me that his wife of 22 years has asked for a divorce. One of my co-workers has spent the past year of her life fighting cancer and was told last week for the 3rd time in a year that it is in remission. My uncle who fights bi-polar desease is without a doubt on his way back to the hospitol. Being in real estate, I have customers that if they do not get their homes sold they are going to loose them. Another close friend has just spent the first Christmas without her Mom who passed away in August. These are just a few things that have occurred in my imediate life lately that are truely sad for me. Then you have the normal stuff, the news, the people you work with and the relationships that we all have and all the crud that they bring with them.
It is a fact, that who you surround yourself with is exactly who you will be. If you are around negative people very long you will soon be negative. The problem with this is, we all tend to be with those we are comfortable being with. A co-worker and friend of mine use to say “water seeks it’s own level”. Well it is true, if we want to be more positive, we need to surround ourselves with positive people. When we hear someone say something negative, we need to immediately say something positive. Try it….it is amazing to watch a negative person react to this. Being positive is a choice. For some of us it comes natural but for others it has to be learned. If you are a person that wants to learn to be more positive or you basically are positive but need a lift me up. Try these options or respond to this and maybe we can all share some ideas that will be helpful to one another. I have had my share of crud and I refuse to let it affect who I am as a person. Call me a optimist if you want but mainly I hope for all of us, that we live the best life we possibly can. Every tough thing I have gone through in my life has given me the opportunity to grow as a person. I have gained strength, knowledge, courage, friendships and love all because a bad thing occurred. My word to you is to take each day as it comes and turn every obstical into and opportunity! Don’t look at the problem….look at the solution.
Some ways to overcome the negative and live with your glass half full:
Instant Positive Attitude
Pacific Daily News Develop positive thinking for 2008
Gratitude-Bliss Meditation
Power of Positive Thinking
Don’t get me wrong, all of the people going through all the crud are a part of my life everyday and I am absolutely determined to be the most positive I can to each and every one of them. You see I have a choice….I can get down and negative with them or help them see the positive in what they are going through. Some will get it and others won’t, it is only by place to allow them to see the other side of a bad situation.
